C.T. Thomas @ GurgleSlurp.com



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Accidental Nudity: Life in the arts is hard
January 30, 2012

“I said I was a lesbian, Mom, not a thespian. You can stop crying.”


1 instance of slightly inappropriate touching!

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Meet the parents, or whoever!
January 27, 2012

Tomorrow night The Princess and I are going out for a ‘meet The Littlest Princess’ almost fiancee’s parents’ dinner. I’m sure they’ll be nice people, and I expect we’ll have a great time. I’ll be careful not to make too many obscenely dirty or horrendously morbid jokes. I won’t even accidentally on purpose have the parents overhear me asking The Littlest if the ointment took care of everything.

As far as I can tell, between the 6 of us there will be:

  • 3 men
  • 3 women
  • 3 people under the age of 35
  • 3 people over the age of 55
  • 5 Jews
  • 6 brunettes
  • 3 doctors
  • 2 guitarists
  • 2 bassists
  • 3 singers
  • 6 bleeding heart Liberals
  • 1 lactose allergy
  • 3 potheads
  • 1 nicotine addict
  • 2 shoe addicts
  • 2 chocolate addicts
  • 6 foodies

Should be good. There’s no reason for them to be, but I think I’ll really enjoy it if The Littlest and his gal are incredibly nervous. Like, fidgety, laugh too loud, sweating through the jacket nervous. And then they’ll have to do the whole thing again with The Littlest’s mom and stepfather!


1 instance of slightly inappropriate touching!

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Accidental Nudity: Crotch Circles
January 22, 2012

Yes Steven, aliens are responsible for the crop circles in your pants. And no, do not post pictures of them on Facebook.

“Yes Steven, aliens are responsible for the crop circles in your pants. And no, do not post pictures of them on Facebook.”


1 instance of slightly inappropriate touching!

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Maybe you just don’t appreciate my humour
July 28, 2011

If a man at work had been putting his fingers in your bum, calling it a 'physical' won't make the shame go away.


1 instance of slightly inappropriate touching!

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Don’t take it personally
July 20, 2011


1 instance of slightly inappropriate touching!

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