C.T. Thomas @ GurgleSlurp.com



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(NSFW) Accidental Nudity: A little something extra for the ladies
November 22, 2012

Don't be alarmed, I'm pretty sure those bumps are there for your pleasure

“Don’t be alarmed, I’m pretty sure those bumps are there for your pleasure.”


1 instance of slightly inappropriate touching!

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Accidental cannibalism?
November 20, 2012

If I feed my mint plants mint tea, doesn’t that kind of make them cannibals?

What is the likelihood that exotic/wild type animals have ever eaten a person? And how much time needs to pass before a person can safely eat that animal without feeling like a cannibal? I ask this because of the conversation I just had with my father about the weird things we’ve eaten or would eat if presented with the opportunity. We’re both pretty adventurous eaters who will try most things, many of those things are herbivores, but some are not. Like alligator and snake and shark, which we both have had. And after I made a (hilarious) joke, we both laughed and then got quiet. Shit. But it isn’t like we caught the damn things and brought them home to cook, having no idea about their origins or history. We were at restaurants – restaurants that weren’t in Third World countries (mostly). Restaurants that have to source their ingredients from reputable places. They were probably farmed somewhere, thus eliminating any possible human meals.

What animals are most likely to have eaten a person? Alligators, big big snakes, komodo dragons, hyenas, wild dogs, big cats (like lions and panthers), vultures. That’s an easy list to avoid for the future.


1 instance of slightly inappropriate touching!

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Accidental Nudity: Play to your strengths
November 16, 2012

Hon, I was diagnosed as an incurable nymphomaniac, I figure I might as well make some money.

“Hon, I was diagnosed as an incurable nymphomaniac, I figure I might as well make some money.”


1 instance of slightly inappropriate touching!

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Accidental Nudity: Professional help
November 7, 2012

But honey, you're the one who told me I needed professional help!

“But honey, you’re the one who told me I needed professional help!”


1 instance of slightly inappropriate touching!

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Accidental Nudity: Intergalactic exploration
October 25, 2012

Easy, Bo*&jam$k!i, these humans prefer a confident, yet gentle entry!

“Easy, Bo*&jam$k!i, these humans prefer a confident, yet gentle entry!”


1 instance of slightly inappropriate touching!

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